Sunday, November 09, 2008

All of the Tourists Covered in Oil

What is it with Greek Orthodox monks? I'm not sure it's pent-up sexual energy being redirected into thrusting fists that one would normally assume to be the cause with anything involving improper behavior and priests. Orthodox Christians tend to be a little more willing to admit that their priests still have penises than their Catholic cousins and as long as you're married before you become a priest, you're allowed to have a wife and kids. I'm assuming that's the main reason you don't have a lot of child-molesting Orthodox priests. When you can enjoy sexy time with your wife after a hard day of praying and burning incense, you just don't find 10-year-old boys all that attractive.

While the Greek Orthodox may not be loving up the pre-pubescent set, they sure do seem to be an overly aggressive bunch. The article linked above is about a recent brawl at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre in Jerusalem. I'm sure when Jesus was slowly dying on the cross at that spot 2,000 years ago he was brought a little comfort in the knowledge that his death would one day bring entertainment to millions as they watched video of his followers getting their fight on in this most holy of places.

What makes this funnier is that this isn't a first offense for the Fighting Monks of Orthodox Christianity. That would make for a great football mascot.


Mickey said...

That would be a good mascot.

And I too was very entertained by that video on the news earlier. Pure awesomeness.

Julie said...

I will take your word for it on the video. The computer is not feeling well today.

And while it sounds like a good mascot idea, it's really not because the other team/fans, would have a hard time getting fired up to crush the monks. And while a blow-out might sound fun, it would ultimately be boring.

Chris said...

My mind went the same place, with the sports references. I was just thinking the fight was probably related to a soccer game that didn't go somebody's way.

Jacob said...

Chris: The funny thing is that one of the news sites I found an article about one of those two monk battles was hosted in the soccer section of that news site. Oddly, it had nothing to do with soccer. The older battle was between rival groups of monks (one group supports the Patriarch in his attempts to reconcile with Catholicism and one group is angry about those attempts and they control a very valuable monastery) and the recent one was over whether or not the Greeks can stand inside a grave while the Armenians feast. That sounds like I'm joking, but I'm not.