Tuesday, December 01, 2009

More on Productivity

Photo: orphanjones, Flickr Creative Commons

Productivity has become my bugbear it seems. I think it's raised its ugly head the last three days on my blog and even prompted a status update on Facebook that involved chafing and overly starched burlap pants. I actually got a ton of shit done yesterday. In fact, I was so productive that I had to stay up until almost midnight watching Monday Night Football just to get my head back on straight. I really only have a couple of things left to do. Today, I need to finesse the webquest my group is doing for one class. The webquest is titled, in my mind only, "Vote Bitches." I embedded my naughty little joke by placing a photo of a Susan B. Anthony coin on one of the pages. Kids at some alternative school will now be corrupted by my subliminal sardonic humor. Instead of getting around to any of this work today (or work for the classes I actually get paid to teach), here's a list of what I've done today:
  1. Read the news. This actually a combination of news, blogs, online comics, podcasts, and whatever crap Woot.com decides to throw out, but it's mostly news.
  2. Commented on Gmail chat to a friend about Mike Huckabee's connection to murdered cops in Seattle.
  3. At a friend's recommendation went back and gave a second chance a piece on McSweeney's about John Cheever as one of Professor X's early mutant projects.
  4. Chatted with that friend about Southern Gothic literature and Charleston Renaissance art via Gmail chat.
  5. Recommended that friend read the article about canned bread and Fabulous Frutini Gum.
  6. Went to break duty.
  7. Started writing blog post about Gertrude Stein and my own charlatanism, but stopped.
  8. Saved that post for later.
  9. Went to a meeting.
  10. Noted the size of the HDTV in the conference room and thought that perhaps the TV I have at home is really a 20 something instead of the 32-inch I had thought it was.
  11. Stared at the freaking giant wasp nest outside the conference room windows and noted that it was no longer covered in wasps.
  12. Briefly considered knocking down that nest after school but decided it was too historic by wasp standards to destroy.
  13. Took note that someone had penciled in "is Gay" after the word "scientific" on the calculator in the middle of the conference room table.
  14. Showed this defaced calculator to a female colleague who may not have seen the humor or beauty in this act of vandalism.
  15. Left meeting annoyed at department chair who is a stupidhead. (No connection to the gay calculator.)
  16. Bought a bag of Cheezits from the vending machine.
  17. Ate a bag of Cheezits.
  18. Thought about the novel I brainstormed and took notes for during the last time I had been in a meeting in that conference room.
  19. Looked up John Cheever on Wikipedia.
  20. Looked up Donald Barthelme on Wikipedia.
  21. Made a comment to the friend I'd been chatting with that Barthelme looked like a mutual friend had said friend decided to become an academic and/or Amish instead of a tattoo aficionado.
  22. Remembered that the mutual friend's dad looked a lot like Ernest Hemingway but didn't bother to bring this up. It is just understood.
  23. Played solitaire while listening to a podcast about Angkor's fall.
  24. Made tea.
  25. Apparently blacked out for about 20 minutes of lost time.
  26. Made more tea.
  27. Started this blog post.
  28. Looked up "sardonic" on Wikipedia.
  29. Finished this blog post.
  30. Actually read what sardonic meant.
  31. Felt relief that it actually meant what I thought it did when I used it in this post.
  32. Found out through Wikipedia article on sardonicism that apparently people from Sardinia are assholes.
  33. Clicked "Publish Post".


Julie said...

If only you had posted each, individual item as an update on Facebook, you might have been able to get Courtney to de-friend you.

courtney said...

I might not have de-friended you if you'd done that only on one day. But I would have been annoyed. And if you did it every day, then I would de-friend you.

Your gchat conversations are much more academic than mine. I'm pretty sure I've never discussed Southern Gothic literature via online chat. Or in person.

Chris said...

Sounds like a good morning. I've gotta read this Mike Huckabee piece now.