This Really Is a Sweet Post

I married the only woman that could stand to live with me and that I wouldn't hate within the first year of marriage. I'm eccentric, low on tact, value honesty to a fault, and find myself unable to like people with certain flaws (and many of these aren't universally held as flaws). I have a dark sense of humor and I wouldn't be willing to put up with a woman who couldn't take ribbing and got her feelings hurt for reasons I considered stupid. In other words, if I upset her when I wasn't trying to upset her, she'd make me resent her for getting upset. It takes a lot to offend me. I see the other side really well and expect those around me to be the same. I've never liked anyone I've lived with by the end of the sixth month, although my dislike for that person never lasted after I moved one with the exception of that one guy in college. One guy I really respect and with another I actually have apologized for being a dick. I still like my wife and it's been more than five years of marriage and cohabitating (although only three and a half of those involved work schedules that had us seeing the other awake for for than 48 hours a week.)

I also have a lot of antisocial tendencies. I refuse to use a phone unless absolutely necessary. I keep my cell phone, usually uncharged, in my car with a charger in car of emergencies, but I don't think I've even used it except to check for messages in two months. I think I called my parents between 5 and 10 times during college and I actually have a really good relationship with them. I'm very close to my sister and have called her exactly three times since she moved to Denver a couple of years ago. I've never called any relatives other than those in the last ten years. You can ask the friends whose blogs are in my links list how often I've ever called them and they're some of my best friends. I require large chunks of time without human interaction and stress aggravates this. K deals with it (although she doesn't handle my frequent retreating into my shell as well as she does many of my other quirks. She tries though.) She has passed on to her mom that I consider calling after 8:59 p.m. a sin on par with child molestation and calling after 7:59 p.m. unethical. Hearing a phone ring makes me angry. I'm not entirely sure why.

I will say that I'm not a real jerk even if all of this kind of sounds that way. I don't control my wife. I rarely criticize her. I control my temper around her, and she's learned that when I shut down when angry that I'm processing the situation and organizing my thoughts so that I'll be able to discuss the issue rationally and calmly instead of hurting and feelings and wasting time with a shouting match. She doesn't like to wait, but I'm not going to let myself say things I'll regret in anger. I'm an incredibly supportive husband. I'm still perfectly aware that I got the better end of the deal in all of this, though.