Anyway, here's the little ball of iniquity that I helped to make. Keep in mind before you view his terrifying visage that since he took up bipedal locomotion about three months ago that he has rightly earned the nickname Crackhead. It's not that he actually smokes crack, but that he kind of acts like a crackhead.
Sometimes I'm a little uncomfortable walking out in public with the kid because I'm afraid people may think I'm some sort of neo-Nazi. Even his looks are evil. I mean, despite coming from a line full of melanistic white people like Greeks, the little bugger could pass for a Swede. Who besides Hitler could love a face like that? And in demonstration of the little monster's greed, apparently one pacifier just isn't enough.
At his current rate, he's going to have the full list of deadly sins ticked off his to-do list by the time he's two, although lust may prove a bit difficult until his reproductive system starts working.And if you're wondering why I chose to publish photos of my son today, it's for several reasons. First, I was really hurting for ideas today. I've been in one of my slumps with the blog the past couple of days. Coming up with ideas has been painful. Second, I know that some of you who don't know me personally may be interested in putting a face to the name of the kid who gets referenced in this space occassionally. Third, Justin talks about his little girl on his blog so I was feeling a little jealous. As for the language chosen to caption the photos, I really can't let the sappy daddy vibe from the baby blog leak over into my decidedly cynical and adult personal blog. Deal with it.
5 comments:
That's why I believe that we live life backwards. Kids don't apprecite how wonderful it is to be fully guided by the id. I, on the other hand, think it would be awesome. I would be appreciative and not like the ingrate you are raising.
heheh That's awesome. There's nothing wrong with posting shots of your own spawn on your blog. It doesn't get creepy until you start throwing up pictures of other people's kids, especially if they're taken from the bushes... at night...
And I'm glad Her Worshipfulness played a small part in it. Seems appropriate, too. Ani went through a phase where she wouldn't got to sleep with fewer than three of the bloody pacifiers in her crib: one in her mouth and one in each hand. And if any of the three happened to fall out of the crib in the middle of the night, she wasted no time in calling her faithful servants forth to begin the search.
And congrats, Chris and Meaghan.
Yeah, I hate to break it to you man, but your kid looks nothing like you. Are you sure the milk man didn't have something to do with this?
And I think you are speaking of where the Bible says we are born inherently evil, needing the grace of God to save us... or something like that. But interpreting that as all babies are evil is surely the same, right?
If you look at my baby pictures you'll see some similarities, but honestly, with my current appearances, I could see how someone would think I was a kidnapper.
Aryan bastard.
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