Wednesday, November 26, 2008

A Treatise on Plumber's Butt

On our way up to the mountains from K's parents' house today, K and I shared a section of suburban road with an elderly motorcyclist. There's no other kind, really. I'm not sure the last time I saw a guy on a motorcylcle without mostly gray hair except for the little turds who weave in and out of Atlanta traffic on their crotch rockets.

But the age and chemical makeup of this particular biker is mostly irrelevant. The important fact of his existance was that the top of his butt crack was exposed to the elements and every driver behind him. You would have thought the cold draft blowing down that normally well protected area would have tipped him off that an area of his anatomy typically hidden from the world was now exposed.

The strange realization K and I made during the 10 or so minutes we jockeyed for position in our side-by-side lanes was that this was a strangely difficult sight from wich to break away your gaze. It wasn't that the man was strangely attractive -- he was plump and the exposed portion of his rump was the vision of cellulite and stretch marks one expects of a man of his age and size -- but he wasn't abnormally grotesque either. The only captivating aspect of his experience was that tip of the crease between his two glute muscles.

There's something odd about accidental exposure of the butt. This man was obviously not attractive toeither of us, but plumber's butt isn't sexy on anyone. A sexy woman purposely exposing this part of her body on purpose as part of a strip tease is sexy. It being exposed because she bent over to pick up a fork is just funny at best.

Perhaps that's the best for everyone.


Julie said...

Maybe he's just out and proud with his butt crack.

Courtney said...

Old man butt crack is like roadkill -- you want so badly to look away, but you just can't.

Mickey said...

I don't even know what to say.