Photo: formatbrain, Flickr Creative CommonsThe computer I have in my classroom is ancient, perhaps more ancient than my career as a teacher. It's at least more ancient than my time at this school. That's not really ancient by career standards, but it's pretty damn archaic by computing standards. As is common with older computers, this one is slow as fuck. I push the power button when I arrive in the morning and about 20 minutes later, I'm actually able to start using it. That saying about things tasting sweeter when you have to wait for them is total bullshit, especially when it comes to computers. Computers are quintessentially American. They're all about immediate gratification and porn. My work computer, on the other hand, is more about deferred gratification, blocked access, and rage. Mountains of rage.
Quintessential is a strange word. I get the essential part, but what does five have to do with being the perfect example of something? Quintessential is the quintessential example of how English is the kid with traumatic brain injury in the community of world languages.
Getting back to the computer thing, having all that time every morning waiting on my computer to quit putzing around gives me a lot of time to sit here and think. Every morning it's the same thing. My computer grinds away below my desk and I stare into a monitor that shows only limited evidence of progress. I take a sip of coffee and the goddamn computer keeps grinding away.
Actually, that's patently untrue. Usually while the computer is doing this, I'm digging around in a Ziploc bag of generic Cheerios and milk. By the time I've finished breakfast, I only have to wait about five minutes before I can get anything to open and another five to ten after that before I can expect to be able to work without frequent hang ups. Still, it's pretty annoying.
I was going to use this as a set up for a post about some of the more surreal aspects of my time at the alternative school a few years back, but I think I'm done writing for today. I supposedly have real work to do or something.