Wednesday, May 05, 2010

My Son Will Pay for the Evils of My Youth

Photo: Vik Nanda, Flickr Creative Commons

I really hope there's no one out there just waiting for my next post. I'm in a slump right now. I'm actually a pretty upbeat fellow this week, but all of my post ideas are just too damn serious. I'm just no feeling it.

It's kind of like the big blob of text I just erased and replaced with this. Facebook recommended today that I friend a girl with whom I went to school, a girl whose life I helped make miserable in fourth grade. I wasn't the leader of the torture or even all that aggressive with it. I don't think I've ever been the type to be all that overt with my more animalistic behavior, but being an active participant in the shunning and the behind-the-back name calling stuck with me enough to be one of those lead weights that I carry around in my stomach. On days like today, some of those weights shift and bring with them the guilt that I think I even felt, at least a little, then.

She had hair strangely the same color as her skin and it was obvious that her family was nowhere near as well off as those of the rest of her classmates. Back then the classes were ranked by test scores and I was in one of the top groups. We wouldn't be exposed to those not like us until middle school. She was out of place, but now I have no idea why we were so obsessed with the idea that she was ugly. I don't think she really was.


Julie said...

Kids are mean. Fact of life. Still makes me sad, too.

FB suggested I friend the last person to lay me off if that makes you feel better.

Courtney said...

A girl who made my life miserable in high school sent me a FB friend request once. I happily ignored it.

I have also lost my blogging mojo, as evidenced by my lack of posts in the last 2 weeks. Something interesting needs to happen so I can get the spark back.

Mickey said...

Yeah, we've all been dicks before, especially when we were younger. And we've all been on the receiving end as well. Or I sure hope we have.

Rassles said...

I had the reputation of being a bully bully. I loathed bullies. And I bullied the shit out of them. Sure, it made me unpopular.

But you've never met my mom. Looking back, I did it more for her than anyone else.

Jacob said...

Rassles, by the end of middle school I hated those kids, more when someone else was the victim.